Different Strokes
‘A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step’, so a rather wise Chinese philosopher said a couple of millennia ago, and that’s often how it feels when I sit down to write.
Where to start…and where am I going…?
It reminds me of a scene from a black comedy movie ‘Throw Momma from the Train’ starring Danny De Vito and Billy Crystal, in which the latter’s character has writer’s block, and his attempts to find the right word for the opening sentence of his novel veer on lunacy. “The night was….” Hot… humid… wet… steamy… and many other permutations were tried and rejected, and it’s not until the end of the film that the right word is eventually revealed. ‘Sultry’. The night was sultry. Ah. So those other words were close, but not close enough. They lacked a certain something.
And how often do we act out a similar game in life, where such subtle nuances can wreak havoc in our world and in our mind? The devil, they say, is in the detail….as anyone who’s ever attempted to find exactly the right colour to paint their walls will surely appreciate. I once made the mistake of entrusting a decorator to procure some cream paint. Suffice to say it was more peach than cream. Three trips to B & Q and half a dozen match pots later, the ‘chosen one’ was finally applied….only to have a considerable quantity of white surreptitiously added to it by Yours Truly between coats when Mr. Painter’s back was turned.
And that room never was really right. A sad case of environment being a metaphor for other things being off-colour in my life at the time; yes, on the surface, it looked great, but a lot of it was a whitewash. People don’t just paper over cracks metaphorically, they often try to do it in reality too, and I’ve a theory that serial DIY-ers may be sending out a subconscious cry for help.
Perhaps I should tout for new therapy and Life Coaching clients at my local B & Q :
‘Lynn Jackson – Life Decorator. Adding colour your life’….
And as well as being an avoidance scam, that sort of perfectionist nitpicking can also flag up control issues, and obsessing over relatively minor details such as shades of cream or nuances of meteorological jargon are also indications that we have trouble accepting that we’re not always – if ever – in control.
And so ‘The Secret’ – Rhonda Byrne’s phenomenally successful book and DVD about the Law of Attraction – appeared to be a lifeline for control freaks everywhere, with its message that we are in control…that we create our world with our thoughts, and that all we need to do is ask for something, engage the imagination and the emotions and – sooner or later – it shall be given. Voila!
All well and good. But the process also entails letting go, and allowing the universe to take care of the ‘how’….and therin lies the problem. 
In control, and yet not in control.
And so, as ever when there’s an element of confusion and/or uncertainty, in marches the ego, barking that it’s ‘in charge’ like a blustering, bumptious and bombastic Captain Mainwearing in Dad’s Army, and the result can be the emotional equivalent of an upturned pot of paint on the living room carpet.
And if little things like paint and vocabulary can galvanise Captain Ego into action, what happens when our fundamental beliefs and perceptions are challenged…what sort of cosmic brush strokes will he and we tolerate and accommodate under those circumstances…?
For instance, the question as to whether there is a perfectly orchestrated Divine Plan or whether we have free will and an innate ability to manifest according to our heart’s desire is debatable, though both apparently contrasting viewpoints are accepted spiritual tenets. But it’s fairly obvious that these two theories are not, on the surface at least, such great bedfellows, and apparent paradoxes like this can cause endless discord and confusion, with the resulting impression that a lot of spiritual and holistic disciplines are at loggerheads.
Take for example, the precision and certainty of Astrology; how can this possibly co-exist with the Law of Attraction which stems from a belief in an entirely malleable backdrop of quantum energy shifts? Or how about Osho’s statement that yoga and tantra are “contrary” (“Yoga is suppression with awareness; Tantra is indulgence with awareness”), and how on earth can Rhonda Byrne’s theories on manifestation square with Eckhart Tolle’s assertion that, “the ego wants to want more than it wants to have”….?
Which are questions that may set the cat amongst the pigeons, but this isn’t intended to suggest that one is wrong and the other right. Remember, ‘hot’ and ‘sultry’, can be the same, but not always….and whilst off-white isn’t white, Barley White, I assure you, is absolutely not the same as Magnolia.
The perceived differences between various religions would be laughable were it not for the trouble they cause, and the same could be said of the ‘New Age’ movement, elements of which seem to have got themselves into a bit of a stalemate. Ashtanga, Hatha, Iyengar and Kundalini may all be forms of Yoga, but in the eyes of some practitioners, their differences far outweigh their similarities, and ne’er the twain shall meet. And that sort of internal conflict certainly isn’t limited to the world of Yoga.
And although I’ve been immersed in the holistic arena for some twenty years, I’d not fully appreciated the constipated thinking inherent in a lot of it until I began promoting Juice.
This PR side to my work has slowly revealed to me just how stuck some practitioners have become, amongst whom there seems to be a vested interest in maintaining the ‘therapy myth’, i.e. that we’re all somehow broken and need fixing, and that this ‘fixing’ is inevitably going to entail ‘processing’ and often, suffering.
And trying to sell such people a concept like Juice – where personal growth and transformation are presented within a spirit of fun, friendship and celebration – is proving to be an uphill task. Do they just not see, or are they frightened to look…?
Yes, it’s vitally important that the holistic world observes high standards and ethics, and that we ‘do no harm’, but it sadly seems that outmoded egoic mindsets are interfering with our collective growth, and whilst there’s a lot of talk about coming together and forming vibrant communities in which people honour and respect their differences as well as their commonalities, the truth is that we’re just not walking our talk.
What’s so challenging about ‘other’…? - especially when it’s often so similar. We may not entirely agree with it or fully understand it, but unless we engage with it, we’ll stagnate. Whatever happened to the premise of walking in another man’s moccasins…? Do we really want a world that’s the pale beige colour of those old walls of mine?
Perhaps we do. Perhaps we feel that a cacophany of vibrant colour as a backdrop to our lives somehow dulls or obliterates our own light, and so perhaps Captain Ego wants neutrality around us so that he can stand out and know he’s there. Is that it…? Do we secretly believe that we will disappear in too much colour and diversity?
If so, perhaps this fear can be embraced in darkness of a different sort.
My years of teaching meditation have taught me that most people who meditate love and adore the feeling of losing themselves, and as any artist or similarly-minded creative and passionate person will tell you, losing themselves in their art, craft or world, is when they’re at their
happiest.
Disappearing bestows amazing presence.
Dare to lose yourself in order to find yourself.
Yes, more paradoxes, but this, it seems to me, is the fundamental building block of the universe.
Everything is darkly light.
Something and nothing.
And how about opening our minds to the possibility that we may sometimes have a closed mind…?
That we don’t have all the answers – ever! – and that now and again, another way might be good for us.
And above all, can we open up to the possibility that feeling good might actually be good for us…? To some, even that seems to be a paradox!
Can we forget safe little tester pots, and ignoring all the ‘stuff’….the contradictions, back-biting, in-fighting and fact-finding…. just dive in and open our arms and mind and heart and embrace whatever makes us feel good…?
Not that everyone will agree, of course….some people will probably tell you it’s very ‘bad for you’. Cream cakes, champagne, chocolate, sunbathing, shoe shopping, Desperate Housewives and writing blogs till 3 in the morning, all spring to mind.
Bad, but good. Though less bad when done in moderation. So, less is more. Another paradox.
But who cares.
..?
Just follow your bliss, your joy. Play. Laugh. Love. Live.
And paint the town…or at least your walls – and, most importantly, the walls of your mind – in bright, beautiful, glowing rainbow-like hues of whatever shade, colour, tint or tone that makes you FEEL GOOD.
And if you want any help, I know a good ‘Life Decorator’, with an extensive palette and a stepladder to some very Grand Designs.
No whitewash.
And you might also be interested to know that we have a very colourful Juice event happening on Sunday, 20th March.
Check it out; Burlesque or Hooping and Fire-starting, all in great company and welcoming surroundings…. lots of fun, growth and transformation!
